uk help for PTSD information

http://www.assisttraumacare.org.uk/

an awsome charity with a help line, info packs and subsidised therapy vailable for those whove suffered from trauma. Do you not sleep well? Suffer anixety and/or panic attacks? Depressed? Flashbacks? Nightmares? Feelin of being "wired" all the time?

Ive lost much to misdiagosis of bipolar when it was icu induced post traumatic stress disorder, there is help, this was my first port of call and they gave me awesome support.

Mania(bi-polar symtom) & Hypervidulance (PTSD symptom) may seem similar to the un-educated but are very different. The treatments VERY different.

KYLIE is the mest medicine

You know i dont know what it is about Kylie. I just dont know, im passed the point of embarassment. For me its about production values, about bubblegum pop, about relief from the darkness of my circustances. Nothing else ive found works quite like smiley kylie. I wouldnt mind but when she first came out i wasnt really very fusted.....i was far too serious about music....and then came the impossible princess album and i was hooked. Did it again, breath just a couple of the songs that rang in my head. I saw changes of direction and creative originality all in a sassy easy to access package. Of course this all culmintaed in seeing her in Aukland may i think 09. I was this time so in the grips of misdiagnosis and bi-polar medication i only remember knee high red boots and a hair style i wasnt sure of, the rest i had to watch the dvd to know what id actualy seen. Non of my photographs came out well, a dot, blurry on the horizon. But i know i was there. See ptsd ment that crouds caused me great anguish, so had to load up on dreadful lorazepam to even get to cuing stage. So as hospitals, anything medical triggers my stress reaction, cos it was ignored for 27 years I get intense feelings of panic. I think of kylie, i think of her as my alter ego, its me up there, prancing, dancing and being sassy. When she sings i believe in you, shes singing it to me. Giving me confidence to sit and not run. I mean wot would i do without my ipod. And this is one indulgence that has no side effects and makes me pretty easy to buy for at Christmas. Kylie is better than any pill or potion.....and she beat her cancer with more digntiy than i could ever muster. So for me i will always love Kylie for without her i think i would be lost in some locked unit, when after all there is nothing pathalogically wrong with my mental status. Ive only reacted intelligently to obsurd circumstances. I mean 1 in 3 people die in ICU, 1 in 5 die on the mechanical ventilator and me well 100+ ICU admissions and 15+ mechanical ventilations so you do the maths.... So its kylie kylie kylie for me! Sends my spirits soring, gives me my armour for the ongoing fight to get correct medical treatments, because modern medicine is sadly lacking in many areas one of them being compassion another time and another caring.....im more than just a file....or in my case 3 files.......to think they locked me in a mental unit....drugged me for 8 years so i couldnt protest......after all that fighting against the odd....and yet i flourish and grow only stronger.......and kylie has never left my side....even upon waking in ICU after surviving yet another attack my laptop is at my side and my Dvd's and MP3's await so i can distract myself from the smell of death all around me.........i just with you all had your own Kylie in your life......she really has saved me......so for me this picture of brits 2002 blue monday mix is the empitomy of how i would like to be......crisp, alluring, attention to detail and delivering........god bless you Ms Kylie Ann Minogue, even if you are half Welsh! WE only have one thing in common and thats being gemini's.........i pray that your 5 year tests show your all clear and that this man is the one. I carry you always.

http://www.kylie.com/home

kylieminogue

kylieminogue

am now following kylie on twitter!!!!!!!! is there no end to my faithful following of this poptastic princess?

kindness of strangers

this was the cleaner, she showed me great kindness, i normaly find that its those axilary staff are the ones with the most kindness and nursing skills. After all compassion and kind words are the most powerful medicine ive found. I will never forget this lady, she saved me when i was on my knees

crap doc #2

This doctor left me in a side room and wouldnt help me with the pain of pneumonia, busted intercosted muscles because she thought me a drug/attention seeking addict. See how quick she is to smile at the camera??!!?? She sewed in an arterial line without local........and tried to convince me i was mad....when all i needed was help for ptsd hospital related anxiety. She wouldnt speak to my pshycologist as she was private and hence deemed not part of my health team. Bitch!

Crap Doctor NZ

This is a psychiatrist called andrew. He had a tissot watch i remember, in 10 mins he worked out i needed to be in a secure unit although i was not of harm to myself, anyone else, and was perfectly justified in how i felt. He ended up bullying me into allowing a volountary section in a secure unit. To this day I still dont know why. AND considering i have a hospital phobia and ptsd caused by traumatic hospital events it was the worse thing he could do. The fact this man, a supposed exspert could not tell teh difference between hypervidulance/hyperarousal and mania is beyond me. BUT hes the one with the tissot watch and ive lost everything. Hes a tosser! How hes in his job i will never know but i will be making a formal complaint against his actions on my return to NZ in October of this year. He may be smiling here but im going to remove his smug grin with honesty and dilligence.

a not so god time march 09

left in a corner and ignored with just an oxygen tank. Thats what you get for being chronicaly ill and labelled bi-polar, also being smart...tossers

sophie "golden balls" Hudson

When i was well but still in difficulties fighting the misdiagnosis of bipolar. But i always have a smile.....this is my good morning world face :)

Pad pad pad n puuuuuuuuuuuur

duddley do right the 3rd

something i lost that i can never replace

PTSD meds

5mg diazepam for generalised anxiety
3.75mg Zopiclone for sleep inducment
25mg Amiltryptaline for pain, depression and anxiety

add to this my usual asthma meds
30mg prednisolone
some inhailed steroidal inhailer i can never remember its name
Singulaire lil pill
Oxlair the new in the moment Anti Ige therapy injection
Comivent neubles for my lil nebuliser
ventolin inhailers about 1 every 4 days

and yes i turned down the lung transplant some 15 years ago, didnt fancy being a transplant guineapig

I will check my meds and list them at a further point.....my thoughts though are this, where are the steroid sparing therapies such as cyclosporin, the calicum therapy to reverse my thinning bones and when is someone gonna listen to my pain induced by long term steroidal myopathy? Even after all this time I still have to fight for the best treatment as possible which considering my last bone scane aged my bones at 65 years when im only 38 means im a lil fiery about it. FOrtunalty for me im formidable and a science major so am not frightend of the god complex lot.

30th jan 10

Well, day three of ptsd treatment. Something thats haunted me for some 27 years from my first ventilation in ICU. After many years i went for help and they said i had bi-polar. Not that i have anything against bi-polar people more the fact that the treatments for the 2 are very different. So after fighting through all that in ICU i lost 8 years to cra bipolar medication hangcuffs. These meds made me so compliant and confused my friends though me lost to them forever. But something inside me just would give up. So I fought, even getting section when i asserted my rights. So after 3 weeks of 14 hours a day researching and emailing prffesors around the globe i come to understand a number of things. 1) not all doctors are gods 2) some docs dont have the knowledge to help you 3)you can find the information and present them in a well reasoned way to make them listen. This process took me some 8 years to atchieve and on day 3 on my treatment which at presant is only drug based due to over 12 month waiting list in the UK for Cognitive Behavioural Therapy for reprogramming of traumatic events i think im doing ok. After only getting 28 hours sleep in 10 days Im back to sleeping full nights, but this is due to zopiclone dossage not through some magic cure. I have much to still fight for, ive had on and off 37 years of steroid treatment 27 of which has been daily. This can cause cushing syndrome, organ failure, brittle bones and mass obesity.....charlming isnt it but life saving for me. SO my lost 8 years cause me much anger as its all down to ignorance and laziness and so unnessesary. So as a baby blogger thats it from me, not that i think anyone shall ever read my ramblings, sch x