30th jan 10

Well, day three of ptsd treatment. Something thats haunted me for some 27 years from my first ventilation in ICU. After many years i went for help and they said i had bi-polar. Not that i have anything against bi-polar people more the fact that the treatments for the 2 are very different. So after fighting through all that in ICU i lost 8 years to cra bipolar medication hangcuffs. These meds made me so compliant and confused my friends though me lost to them forever. But something inside me just would give up. So I fought, even getting section when i asserted my rights. So after 3 weeks of 14 hours a day researching and emailing prffesors around the globe i come to understand a number of things. 1) not all doctors are gods 2) some docs dont have the knowledge to help you 3)you can find the information and present them in a well reasoned way to make them listen. This process took me some 8 years to atchieve and on day 3 on my treatment which at presant is only drug based due to over 12 month waiting list in the UK for Cognitive Behavioural Therapy for reprogramming of traumatic events i think im doing ok. After only getting 28 hours sleep in 10 days Im back to sleeping full nights, but this is due to zopiclone dossage not through some magic cure. I have much to still fight for, ive had on and off 37 years of steroid treatment 27 of which has been daily. This can cause cushing syndrome, organ failure, brittle bones and mass obesity.....charlming isnt it but life saving for me. SO my lost 8 years cause me much anger as its all down to ignorance and laziness and so unnessesary. So as a baby blogger thats it from me, not that i think anyone shall ever read my ramblings, sch x